I only have 8 minutes left before I go out for lunch. I'm listening to Escala's Palladio. I set it on repeat as I'm writing this.

It's christmas eve and I'm feeling like crap. Well, God didn't say that just because it's his bdae, shit won't happen right?

I'm so mad... so so mad... or mebbe i'm stressed... so so stressed... i had a nightmare ytd about all the HMs not making it for camp... and I cried.. I woke up in tears.. Then while checking my mail.. realize that there were lots of confusion and miscommunication.. I find myself doubting my capabilities alot especially given that I'm the Camp Commander. I've never been Camp Commander before. Nobody ever entrusted me such a huge responsibility. and now. Gmail logged me out because I logged into my blog using another email. it sucks! I can't remember where I left off again! Second time today coz my mum accidentally closed all my firefox just now and I had to retrace the few emails I was reading at the same time.

Today's lunch is suppose to be a happy one. I don't know how happy I'll be or do I have to fake it. Seriously, I rather not have any visitors today. I want to do my work. Just do my work and mebbe play a little burnout. (haha. I almost said burn notice). But I've already agreed to meet him later. I set all my plans aside and plan my time so that I can meet him later. But.. he can't do it for me. He always needs time to himself. Fine. I can accept that. Have all the time in the world. I think if I die now, he'll be happiest coz then there'll be no more obligations. no more at all.

Palladio comes to an end and it's almost 1pm. That's when we're leaving. that's it. no more coming back.